Join now for free!

I am a:
next »

A Quick Guide for Cottaging Newbies

Whether you're straight or gay, you've probably heard of "cottaging." The most common definition of this term is "seeking partners in public restrooms for homosexual activity" - or something along those lines.

gay couple
But is there more to it than that? Let's find out!

The public aspect of cottaging is really important. By heading out into public spaces to find sex, men (and it's a term usually applied to gay men) can hook up with strangers for NSA fun. That could mean oral sex or hand jobs, but can extend to anything possible in a standard toilet cubicle.

Looking at the History of Cottaging

Gay guys have been seeking public sex for hundreds, probably thousands of years. From the Agora of Athens to the back streets of medieval Japan, guys have been looking for strangers to explore their sexuality without getting caught since civilization began.

However, modern cottaging emerged in Britain in the 19th century. When Victorian authorities built public toilets, they tended to resemble cottages (small urban or rural houses). As homosexuality was illegal and frowned upon in those days, men would visit these places to hook up with each other.

As there were no gay bars or legal meeting spots, guys would be forced into places like lavatories to meet other men. These days, while homosexuality is totally legal in most countries, cottaging continues to thrive.

Why Are People So Into Cottaging?

For some people, the survival of cottaging is a mystery. After all, the reason guys went to toilets for sex in the first place was to hide from the authorities, not because toilets are sexy.

But things have changed. Whatever kind of sexy activity people engage in, risk is a big turn-on. Meeting strangers in toilets for sex - sometimes using glory holes to conceal the identity of each partner - can really set some guys going. And for some people, the sordid environment just adds to the experience. They don't want clean sheets and perfume. They want reality, and intense, one-off sexual encounters.

How to Get Into Cottaging Near You

If you're gay or bisexual and want to try cottaging for yourself, there are some things to bear in mind. Firstly, it pays to remember that what you are going to do is probably illegal. While gay sex is fine, public sex is still generally outlawed - particularly in public buildings like toilets.

If you can handle the risk (hey, it might even turn you on) that's great. But how do you signal to guys in your local cottaging spot that you're looking for sex? After all, not everyone will be there to fuck.

Cottagers tend to have certain signals. For instance, tapping your feet in the cubicle is a common indication that someone is looking for sex. Or just making eye contact can be a total giveaway. But be aware that some risk is involved. It's just part of the game.

Related terms:

Image source: pololia -